note: potential employers: please do not judge me on my diaryland. that's lame.

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2005.01.10 2:37 p.m.

yah. toronto.
good times.

where the eff are all the cute boys? that's actually becoming my top priority because of being so lonesome and hating everyone. oh, except that i'm really not that lonesome.. and it takes effort to hate people. i'm really just grumpy and irritable.

earlier, i posted two peices of news on my other diary that i hoped would be proven false. unfortunately that seems not to be the case. eff.
so viv did have a stroke (but i saw+hugged+kissed her and she seems okay and good. i hope.). and erica isn't here..so i'm assuming she's not coming back.
this blows.

oh, right, my trip back was fine. i slept the entire plane ride so i had no idea of storms or anything. that was sweet. i got lost several times in the airport (reassuring) and finally got home. ali left her crud all over my apartment but it is actually all fine. except for all the rotting food in the fridge - that's irritating me. whatevs.
oh i couldn't find my blankets and pillows the first night (they boxed them up i guess and put them under everything else..) so priscilla lent me some covers.
actually, without priscilla things would be far worse. her and chris made me dinner that first night too. it's good to have neighbors. gotta make yer own family.

i spent the first couple of days mostly hibernating. not from cold (it's warm here) but from...well, i don't know, being crazy. and it really isn't like i have ten billion friends here. especially outside of school. i'm so sad miranda isn't around. who will go to utopia (the restaurant i mean) with me? i spent the weekend rediscovering my love of little italy (how is it so beautiful?) and wandering around outside. it is gorgeous here.
oh, i've also been spending vast amounts of time redecorating my place and arranging it and so on. goddamn is it hot.
serious.

i've moved my bed by the window and opened things up and put up gorgeous pictures (including my "prairie window")..and a red table cloth and curtains and just everything is so well-placed now and open - i have room to dance and spin and all of that.

the mixtapes that i got for birthdaychristmas are all so good. i keep putting a new one in and getting addicted and not wanting to try the next, but then the next is just as good. it's hot shit.
i've been listening to tapes i made for myself too. joni mitchell, leonard cohen, buffy st. marie, and motown. pretty awesome.

priscilla and i and jenn went for brunch at aunties and uncles on friday and it was so good. serious. and david was so cute+nice and he sat with us for a bit, actually all the guys talked with us. what good people. david's working on his new album with howie beck and soon it will be done i hope because he's really good. and i want to listen to it.

i worked at chala's restaurant (luna) on sunday, they needed someone so i just came in for a few hours. it was funny because i've never served before. it made me nervous. but i made some sweet monies and it was pretty fun. the place is so small that it's hard to screw up too badly. we listened to loud motown and danced around. i miss miranda. she and i listened to motown all the time at big chill. all the time.

man this entry is a bore-factory for anyone who isn't me.

i went by the porch house last night. only scott was home. i'm never prepared for how fippant and rude scott can be..but it was actually fine. he invited me in for a minute while he got ready to go out. i do quite like him i think... daryl was out with his new girl. that'll be interesting. to see if we're still friends at all with him being with someone.
i like their cat. i like priscilla's kittens too, even if they do have dumb names. i will call them puppy and bird.

school sucks. serious. all of us are considering dropping out. no..well..kind of. but we had class with christina this morning and she's pretty nice and seems like she wants to be more involved in the program and help make changes and stuff..so that was slightly reassuring.
she's very helpful to have around because she, her husband, and her son are all working. and connected and all of that.

i haven't seen paul yet. tomorrow i hope. it will just be awkward though..guaranteed.
i did see neil and since i've decided that i hate him it was such a shock to me that he seemed really glad to see me. really quite bizarre. what with the hugging and the patting (my favorite! made me feel just like a woman) and the smiling.

things between ali and i are strange and strained. i don't know how i feel about her at all. i bet we'll be in the same class though and then we'll have to figure shit out. dammit.

i like katrina a lot..but there really aren't many people in my program i'd consider friends. that's a pain.
i've seen a couple of the boys i have crushes on but not really. well, rory and i talked breifly. i need more crushes to make me want to come to school.
we're not in the theatre building at all though this term so that sucks my nut. we're spread out all over campus in an annoying way. it takes so long to get from one place to another.

this is getting long. well, what do you expect.....

i haven't really talked to anyone. i feel disjointed and oddly lost which is odd because i feel completely at home in my tinybeauty apartment.

if you don't come and visit me we're not friends anymore.

i'm tired. i'm tired. i wish i had more of a break before all this school business.
i've got my student loans stuffs all done. so that's hot. maybe i won't die on the streets just yet.
we'll see. we'll see.

previously - and then

*oh random entry*

all the diarylands. - 2008.02.21
I move my head. - 2008.01.27
read the other one. - 2008.01.21
was Medium? - 2008-01-17
Or maybe I won't. - 2008.01.15

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