disclaimer: this is the life and times of meredith r. mistletoe. i'm making a slight attempt to disguise my identity and hide things that i write about and pretend i don't feel things i do. but if you read this and i don't know you read it, then you read it at your own risk. and you should let me know you're reading it... especially because a lot of the time things need clarifying or aren't quite true anymore or etc etc etc.
note: potential employers: please do not judge me on my diaryland. that's lame.
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2002-03-19 1:34 p.m.
my room (bed) smell like him. my clothes smell like him.
he stayed until 3 in the morning. and it was really nice. really really nice. there have been reasons i've wanted action these past months....and the truth is that it's not the sex. or being sexual in any way. it's the cuddling. it's just being held. (i don't even think that kissing is that brilliant...) we rented a movie, but it didn't get watched. we were both extremely tired. (good lord he has bad taste in movies.)
i love the beginning part...when you get to admit that you like a person, and why and for how long and things that you were thinking when you were with them in the past. i just really like that. he's so much bigger than me, probably weighs twice as much. and i felt pretty safe, see...and that's what i need. i just need to be surrounded.
it occured to me that he is a man. not a boy. he's like a guy. who goes to bars and has friends that are married. he's old, see? grown. (and he has a full gym at his house...ai)
and rationally when i think about this, it doesn't make sense. none of this. at all. and i don't know how long it'll last. and that's bad, because i think he might want this more than i do.
we went to get a video and i didn't feel like finding socks so i wore my brother's huge winter boots and i stomped around the store and laughed at myself the whole time. (aaron just thought i was crazy.)
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it also occured to me that he is somewhat like past boys, but just in little ways. he's like andrew in that he thinks he's older than he is. he over-analyzes the same too...
and strangest of all, he has the exact same birthday as jeffmorton. same age and everything. luckily he has no friends named jon, john or jan from what i've heard......
this is all really strange...he wears suits and cologne. he doesn't know how to be...i don't know...strange...? and he won't smoke pot with me...(heehee). he really like hippies though, so much, and i can't understand why. i think it has something to with how none of his friends really know how to express themselves, to be creative. i really don't know how my friends are going to react to him. with him. i really don't.
he said that he thought i was cute since the job interview. and that i had to come back, he said it didn't matter if i was good, he would have wanted me to work for him anyway. but i won't. angelo (the guy he works under) said...becareful, she's one of those hippies. she'll use big words with you.
and it's true. i will (but i'll explain them to him.)
i really want alisin to meet him.
aaron. and the stupidity of what i'm getting myself into.
previously - and then
*oh random entry*
all the diarylands. - 2008.02.21
I move my head. - 2008.01.27
read the other one. - 2008.01.21
was Medium? - 2008-01-17
Or maybe I won't. - 2008.01.15
diarylanded oldered profiled emailed
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