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disclaimer: this is the life and times of meredith r. mistletoe. i'm making a slight attempt to disguise my identity and hide things that i write about and pretend i don't feel things i do. but if you read this and i don't know you read it, then you read it at your own risk. and you should let me know you're reading it... especially because a lot of the time things need clarifying or aren't quite true anymore or etc etc etc.

note: potential employers: please do not judge me on my diaryland. that's lame.

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2004.07.27 3:41 p.m.

so i thought i was fairly well-liked at school (and still do..to a degree) but someone scratched my face out in a photo of me on the board. what the hell? i can't actually figure out who would do that..i mean, are we in grade 8? seriously. besides aubrey i didn't really think anyone hated me. it's bothering me a lot.

but i still maintain that some people like me.

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paul's dad is dying. they think either this week or next. this means that paul won't be around almost at all. i'm so sad. for paul and his family and for him not being around for all our crowning achievements. and he's sad.. he's so endearing because of his pure honesty. selfishly, i did want him to come to vocal masques..but it sure puts things in perspective. i mean, the importance of things in the world. i talked to him after class and i said something about how i hoped things would be as okay as they could be and about how he's always there for me when i have my various traumas and that i wanted us to be able to be there for him and he said that we were and kind of laughed at me (in a nice-eye way) and then i told him i'd give him nice eyes and he laughed and tried to smoosh my face. he's pretty good.

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i wish i didn't have to work tonight. i'm so hungry, i have to eat before i get there..i don't think allll this ice cream is so good for me. at all.

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while randomly wasting time on the internet i was looking at the cast list of park bench's new movie (which he wrote, produced, acts in, and directed) and it turns out one of the teachers that we'll have next year is in it. that's too funny. actually, most things about park bench are pretty funny. i was just visiting his website and watching all his video clips. too funny. but really good actually. even his music video.

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i did go to chala's for the dinner party last night. and miranda came too for once. it was pretty fun in odd ways. scott was in a lot of pain (he has a weird stomach pain that the doctors can't figure out..) so he was being a little..i don't know. we weren't getting along as swimmingly as usual. it was good though because it made me realize that i don't actually like him..it's more that i want him to like me. daryl and i were close though. i really enjoy conversations with him. daryl and scott were both sunburned so i called them both lobster-faces. miranda didn't talk much, as per usual, but she still seemed to have fun. we had some rice and curry and fruit salad and other delicious things (like too much white wine).

after dinner we walked and bought some drugs and then smoked them on the porch. it was nice and daryl let me lean on him even though he was pretty sunburned. so i'm tired because i didn't get much sleep at all. but it was worth it i think..i'm getting really attached to that porch (physically)..it's going to be so strange to go home and miss all these kids i'm just getting close with no. i'm going to be sooo sad. i get more and more scared of coming home.

previously - and then

*oh random entry*

all the diarylands. - 2008.02.21
I move my head. - 2008.01.27
read the other one. - 2008.01.21
was Medium? - 2008-01-17
Or maybe I won't. - 2008.01.15

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