note: potential employers: please do not judge me on my diaryland. that's lame.

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2002-03-21 6:38 p.m.

i'm liking this daily routine of adding entries...especially because what else do i have to do? really....

me and the racist prick (ie aaron) got into an argument yesterday. he isn't actally. a racist prick. but sometimes...i guess it's just because i don't understand racism at all. and he's trying pretty hard to go against what he's been taught for his whole life: that aboriginal people are different than the rest of the population. far far worse. (i can't imagine someone teaching that...) he's trying. but still it makes me want to vomit when he blames something someone does on their being native (and he makes the stupid face. fuck.). i really fucking hate it.

we also got into a bad discussion about his work. angelo isn't a good influence. not really. but i don't want to tell him that i have decided this because that's the side his last girlfriend took. and i want to be nothing like her. but she's right about some stuff. i'm not sure aaron is as happy as he says. at all. i wouldn't be if i was home only one day a week. and the rest of the days were more than eight hours. i couldn't be. but i don't think he knows what else to do. and angelo wouldn't let him quit. i can guarantee it. he'd guilt trip him into staying. (and all of this makes me so frustrated and sad.) � � � aaron basically has no friends in the city except people that he works with, and angelo told him that he wasn't allowed to keep on being friends with people after they left the company. "they aren't worth it." this explains why aaron is lonely. � � i just can't imagine something this strange. it doesn't compute (man i'm a nerd).

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andrew's diary is worth looking at today. you can all witness our argument first hand! and it's about diaryland! (yes, i was hard. but it's all true.)

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i got to thinking today. about how i can do anything. i am not commited anywhere. to anything. to anyone. my mum wants me to move out. a lot. or at least get a job. but why would i move out here? why wouldn't i just move away? ashley is working at a hotel up in the mountains. they need people there. i love ashley. i could just go. for three months even. i should write to her and ask her about it. i'm not sure i could do it. i'm not sure i'd have the courage.
i also want to act. to be an actor. to be famous. billions of famous. if i stay here i will get an agent. i could also move to vancouver. or victoria. and get a job and a tiny appartment. with a balcony. and if i lived in vancouver i could take the ferry across to seattle.....ai. (oh i'll go anywhere. her face was just a smear on the pane.)

seriously though. anywhere. although i have to say i'll canada, because of health care. and no need for a visa and so on and so on. (and i secretly love it.)
maybe i'll go and stalk diaryland's creator...
wow, that's so exciting. i can bring this with me everywhere. the internet is amazing! (so a nerd. so A nerd.)
i have relatives in thunder bay. and white rock. i like already-in-place support systems. a lot.

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i told aaron that maybe his problems in life stem from not eating enough ice cream. and now that i'm sitting here eating mint-chocolate-chip i realize how brilliantly right i am. brilliant.
i really need a good recipe for pancakes. please? everyone? by saturday?

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i need to go somewhere.

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(who left a message in my diary as booby? if it actually was bobby, then it's mighty funny, but otherwise...who? seriously.) i need to go somewhere. be something.

previously - and then

*oh random entry*

all the diarylands. - 2008.02.21
I move my head. - 2008.01.27
read the other one. - 2008.01.21
was Medium? - 2008-01-17
Or maybe I won't. - 2008.01.15

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