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disclaimer: this is the life and times of meredith r. mistletoe. i'm making a slight attempt to disguise my identity and hide things that i write about and pretend i don't feel things i do. but if you read this and i don't know you read it, then you read it at your own risk. and you should let me know you're reading it... especially because a lot of the time things need clarifying or aren't quite true anymore or etc etc etc.

note: potential employers: please do not judge me on my diaryland. that's lame.

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2007.04.04 4:59 p.m.

Well. It becomes clearer and clearer that I'm terribly off-my-rocker.

Hmm.

I think I need counselling. Why isn't psychotherapy free? Man if I were rich I would sign up with at least four counsellors/phychiatrists/therapists. Just to test them all out. Then I would set them on a race to find out what's really wrong with me. And the prize would be one billion dollars.
Or not.

I've always wanted to be committed.

I don't believe in therapy. I like it, I mean, I enjoyed my college therapist because I just got to talk about myself for a good hour. And we never, ever had to talk about her. It was kind of my ideal arrangement.
But I don't believe it did any good really.
I don't believe in therapy for smart people. Smart people usually know what's wrong and how to deal with it and why they're not dealing with it and how to manipulate other people into thinking that they're working through it. I think it's hard for smart people not to manipulate others. I don't know if it counts if they're unawares.. but.
I love it when people call me on shit. I mean, I also hate it. But it's usually productive.

Today I am officially doing nothing. Except that I went to the medi-clinic. And got diagnosed with a bladder infection. You can imagine I am very happy camper today and not whiney at all. Actually, it's not that bad. But I never want one again because the medication cost $20. Which I did not have. I hate not being able to afford necessities. I love how they tell you to drink lots of liquids. Yeah, that's exactly what I feel like doing.
So I plan on lying around whining. Actually, I'm pretty excited about it. I'm excited to have my jobs start soon so that lying around feels like an accomplishment and not like a failure.

Yesterday I made more cupcakes and then I brought them to SarahB's radio show birthday party. She and a whole lot of musicians played live-to-air on the U of T radio. The musicians and us hangers-on all packed into the studio and drank and ate cupcakes. It was a pretty good set and I mostly just bothered Leslie and David.. so I had fun. Oh yeah, and we plugged MCDA. Of course.

MCDA is seriously the sweetest thing ever. If we don't make shit happen soon I'm going to barf on my face.

Things that are ridiculous:
- That it's snowing outside
- That Blister in the Sun is used in a fast-food commercial
- That Niki refuses to have her picture taken for MCDA unless she's covered completely by a white sheet like a hallowe'en ghost
- How many cupcakes I've eaten today

I had another night of extreme dreams. I think because I was waking up frequently. But my dreams had good moral lessons for me. The main one being: If your family rents a mansion for you all to vacation in (this part of the dream was so bitten from BTM) you shouldn't invite along three eligible bachelors. It will not end well, no matter how hard you try to manipulate them. Valid point, dream me.

previously - and then

*oh random entry*

all the diarylands. - 2008.02.21
I move my head. - 2008.01.27
read the other one. - 2008.01.21
was Medium? - 2008-01-17
Or maybe I won't. - 2008.01.15

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