note: potential employers: please do not judge me on my diaryland. that's lame.

.

2004.05.03 2:48 p.m.

hey internet! that's fun. i've been feeling cut off, even though it's only been a few days.

things are...good and everything. you know.

i didn't get kicked out of school! i'm not even on probation. it's for the best i hope. though marks aren't all in yet so i don't know whether or not i failed comm, it would be hillarious if i did.

only 235 days left until my birthday. well, that's no time at all. and that means 236 days until christmas. i did some cooking yesterday with my christmas apron on. and laughed. my therapist and i talked about how laughing is one of the most important things in life. because it is.

i like counselling, but it also makes me feel slightly awkward. i'm learning how much irritating rules my life. i should learn to control that a bit.

not that some people/things aren't justifiably irritating. i just should learn to curb my discomfort around it.

i went to a theatre kid party on friday night. it was really quite fun. quite. last week at gala (kind of like prom) ali and this guy scott (the one who's always flirting and stuff) kissed. so at the party on friday she left me to go off in a darkened bedroom with him..though they were just talking (boring!). but it was good because then i had to make friends with all the theatre kids. it sucks because now i won't see them for another 8 months because of our bizarre schedules. but still. and this one boy i had a little crush on, lee, told me that i was very attractive, and that if he didn't have a girlfriend he'd be all over me - like a fat kid on a smartie. gross!!!!! like a dog on a pork chop. grooooosssss!!! but it was hilarious, and that's what really matters. he was so drunk. and then i danced for a bit with another cute boy, joe, who had a broken fly and baby's breath in his hair. aww, funny. and i spent most of the night hanging out with scott's friend sean, who was very very nice. i wish we were still in school with them so that we'd hang out. we just had such matching (terrible) views on society and relationships. it really seems like we should hang (make) out.

so my interview, six teachers vs. me. in a hot way. no, it was fine though, they really know me and what i need to work on. sooo much. and they told me that i should embrace woman-hood (in other words though.), and then i vomited on them. no, not quite. and they told me that i should think less in the work, and not be afraid to make wrong choices. all very valid. and they told me i should take up space and gain weight (in a figurative sense).

sherman got kicked out. and kim left of her own accord. i'm glad. i mean..yeah. sherman blocked every improv and could not take direction. kim just wasn't really there or enjoying the program..and also was dumb. i'm sorry. but dumb.

i think a lot more kids will go at the end of the year. i'd bet money.

i ended up working by myself on saturday for three hours. it was good and busy and i got to choose the music and eat whatever ice cream i wanted. and i made $10 in tips. which is pretty sweet considering i never expect any.

chala's friend (love), allan, came into town this weekend. on his way tree-planting. he's gorgeous and funny and confident and open. i wish he'd move here and make chala happy.

all it takes is the love of a good man. right?

or something.

i've been tv-less for a month now. amazing. it's bothering me though, i'll admit. i did spend $55 at value village yesterday though. i bought t-shirts and sweaters and a (great) bra and some sheets (which i made into a duvet cover) and some shoes and a mug. it was fun. i really like new things. i have to stop spending money. right now. or later.

i didn't go out dancing at all this weekend, and i feel worse for it.

previously - and then

*oh random entry*

all the diarylands. - 2008.02.21
I move my head. - 2008.01.27
read the other one. - 2008.01.21
was Medium? - 2008-01-17
Or maybe I won't. - 2008.01.15

diarylanded oldered profiled emailed
guestbooked noted surveyed surveyed2 pictured

myspaced