note: potential employers: please do not judge me on my diaryland. that's lame.

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2004.11.06 3:04 p.m.

well, it's three in the afternoon and i haven't updated yet. that's kind of bizarre. maybe because i don't know what to say.

i hate the internet.

i got an awesome awesome email today. it made me happy. i love the internet. okay, you know another blue door (well, you should anyway because they are so so good), well it was from lead-singer-dave's girlfriend, hilary (henceforth refered to as abdhilary). who i'm actually surprised that i haven't mentioned her on here (well maybe i have but i can't find it..stupid 805 entries) since i secretly love her and dave and their baby. and always ask nathan about how they're doing (now who's creepiest?). i've only ever talked to her once, in was at sneaky dees and she said she was sad not to be able to dance because she was very pregnant. and i decided i really liked her.
anyway, apparantly she's been reading my diary for a while now and decided to tell me about it. how awesome. and she was feeling guilty, which is silly because it's on the internet so obviously anyone can read it and i can't feel bad about that. but i do really really like knowing who's reading it.
so she read back entries and knows about things with carnathan and i. and everything. which i think is really funny. i mean, there are things i shouldn't write about on the internet. but i do anyway. and i have no secrets really. though it would be weird if nathan was reading this. but also fine. there's no point hiding shit (oh wait, i still do. in real life). and i shouldn't mention bands by their real full names. or people for that matter. i should make a better attempt at diguising awkward information.
point being. why do people read this shit? i should try and be more entertaining. well, i'm glad.
also, i think that abdhilary's email was one of the best written ones i've read. possibly ever. and she should really get a diary.

i maintain that this diary will be weird x 200 when i'm famous.

yeah. so diary. hey..how are you? i was in a terrible mood when i woke up...and then i talked to fraser for sooooo long and now i feel ten billions times better.
it is kind of crazy about how everyone is in love with fraser these days. makes obvious sense.
i asked him if he wanted to date again and he said no. well now who's heart is broken?

yesterday i broke (well, sprained) my ankle. on my way to work. which was a good party. so i couldn't really feel it so i went to work. and worked on it for a few hours. and it swelled up and made me feel fat (ew that smoothie went straight to my ankle!).
but other than that work was fine.
magazines are crazy. people magazine had elliottsmith's new cd as their top pick this week. oh ho the baby.

on one tree hill last night they kept talking about the constantines. if tv shows don't stop stealing my ideas i will eat their faces off.
i wonder if my tv show would actually be good.
it's strange how much i like tv and how most of my friends don't. it's almost taboo to like tv in the intellectual circles. i like tv a lot. and magazines and movies and fashion and celebrity.

anyway. i did end up going to amigos. and it was really quite fun. for at least 7/8ths of the evening for sure.
i really liked both bands, possibly the first (gentleman reg) more than the second (stars) though. i got some pins of gentleman reg, the guy was so so sweet.
and i danced. why did i dance? what the hell's wrong with me? i just decided i was being a big baby about it and that it was really fine so i just used it normally. well, i'm sad now i'll tell ya.

i'm glad that john's my new best friend. fraser says i shouldn't refer to everyone as my best friend. but they all are. for instance; fraser's my best ex-boyfriend friend, niki's my best saskatoon girl friend, priscilla's my best-dry-hump friend, chala's my best long-time friend, constantine's my best i'm-just-getting-over-you friend, etc etc. and john's my best new friend.
i'm dead serious about all of it.
point being. i like seeing john because he really amuses me. and i'm glad to have him around at shows.

i saw elicia for a bit too. i haven't seen her at all recently and i wish i did. soon hopefully. i think the boy she's now seeing is really pretty.
i talked to andrewkeith for a bit too. i really think he's funny. and like him a lot sometimes.
i have strange histories with everyone i think. i love that.

i was really glad that niki came by. she's so the funniest person. but also the kindest. but sometimes that isn't for the best.

there was a very awkward situation at the end of the night which invovled jeffmorton saying a cruel thing (which maybe he didn't me as it sounded) and me over-reacting and crying and then jeffmorton leaving and now everything is a little crazy between all of us.
not that it hasn't been for months.
just i think that now maybe things should be talked about.

things between me and many people need to be talked about.

there were such nice bits to yesterday that are harder to remember because of how scratchy i was feeling by the time i finally left.

and i'm still feeling strange about things today. mostly so awkward and off.
and today i can't walk on my one foot at all. it's swelled remarkably. my mum says i should go to the clinic. but i won't. what could they possibly say?

previously - and then

*oh random entry*

all the diarylands. - 2008.02.21
I move my head. - 2008.01.27
read the other one. - 2008.01.21
was Medium? - 2008-01-17
Or maybe I won't. - 2008.01.15

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