disclaimer: this is the life and times of meredith r. mistletoe. i'm making a slight attempt to disguise my identity and hide things that i write about and pretend i don't feel things i do. but if you read this and i don't know you read it, then you read it at your own risk. and you should let me know you're reading it... especially because a lot of the time things need clarifying or aren't quite true anymore or etc etc etc.
note: potential employers: please do not judge me on my diaryland. that's lame.
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2004.03.08 9:16 a.m.
holy stress.
i wish i felt okay about life in general.
i feel off and unwritable. that's ridiculous. i feel unworthy and unappreciative and twitchy. um..i miss you?
toronto is giant and ugly and hot and there's some cute boys but maybe not the right ones. and there's not familiarity or family or home.
oooohhhh home. ohh i just want a little HOME. a real home with a home feeling and sense of reality and bakeware and decorations. my room in my present house is an almost-home. but dammit i have to leave so quick. bloody hell! i put up all my christmas lights and a weakerthans poster and set everything about just right. but what's the point? oh i'll only have to pack it away in two weeks! gahgah.
and pack for where?????? i am homeless again. death on the streets is imminent.
coming back was hard. brittany was around very breifly and then she left and there was no one. no one to call, no one to see. i felt very small. so then i watched 'when harry met sally...' and then i felt envious. oh love, how evasive you are. i'll track you right down and fork you. or spoon you! ha.
i miss seeing people i know just around. although, chala and i were sitting in utopia last night when steve of the carnations walked by. ha! toronto isn't soooo big.
chala is a saving grace. i can't lie. but she thinks she's moving to mexico. sure only for august. but still! i will plead abandonment and have her deported back here. no..but i will be lonely.
i better make some more friends. i hate making friends. how time-consuming!
this is so full of exclamation. horrid.
i'll not be late for class!
previously - and then
*oh random entry*
all the diarylands. - 2008.02.21
I move my head. - 2008.01.27
read the other one. - 2008.01.21
was Medium? - 2008-01-17
Or maybe I won't. - 2008.01.15
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