note: potential employers: please do not judge me on my diaryland. that's lame.

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2002.08.28 4:27 p.m.

i tried to update last night but diaryland wouldn't let me...i'm not sure why. it was a fucking long entry....o i cut and pasted it somewhere. i should go and get it.... here
i had such vivid dreams last night. crazily vivid. like when my wallet fell on the ground and my library card was on top and pennies started sliding out of the change purse. so exact. and it was definitley in colour. and i had two seperate sections of dreams, with different themes. separated by getting up to pee. the first section was neat, it was just running around with most of the closest people from last night, doing neat things and listening to music. there was this big show and a pool and lots of fun.

last night was so nice. (with the glitch of getting those damn bikes stuck together....but...you know....how many actal kids does it take to unhook two bikes....)     seeing toby was really nice. i always find him so friendly and open. i am very jealous of that. and he brought candy and chocolate! brilliant. i like it when there gets to be too many people so they

all seperate into really well relating smaller groups (as opposed to the slightly awkward trying to be clever larger group). i love how smart everyone (well...) is. i love conversation.   outside was nice too, darkness is neat and everyone could move freely. run from place to place and wander off. alisin and me are soooo strange. i really have never had a relationship like this. we love being best friends and hate things about each other. it's so hard. and great. i love bothering fraser. it's so fun. i'm not sure when this became something that i do all the time, but i like poking him and hugging him. i think it's because he makes funny faces and doesn't really care what i do. i really like hugging people in general though. but i don't like it when people touch me sometimes. i just hate it. just in certain moods. i decided to start thinking about everything i do in terms of 'sin or not sin'. so far it isn't working. i have no concept of sin. i mean when i

let out a long stream of profanities in wal-mart today in front of impressionable young children...was that a sin? i think i like sinning. wow. god is so weird. i'd like to sit down with jimjam someday day with a checklist and go over everything that religious people think about. it's odd that people are still religious. i have to look into the dogon tribe, remind me to do that. but yeah, paul daniel and me made better friends yesterday...by spitting on each other. i think i'm one of the only people who thinks that's a really good game. but yeah. he's really crazy. but good.   girls night was nice. although i didn't stay as long as i would have wanted. goodgood conversation. smart girls. great hummus and pita breads, holy god, i think i could eat that every day. man, though, bed was great after being up for twenty-four hours. and i didn't get up until three this after noon. but i've been up for almost seven hours now and i'm ready for bed. i have to work at 7 tomorrow. i don't know if there's anything i'm forgetting....

yeah...so that was from last night. i just worked all day today, so i don't have much to add i guess. ooo, constantine came in today...you remember, that really pretty boy who comes in sometimes with his friends and is a vegetarian and has really nice eyes (sigh sigh double triple sigh. shut-up.) anyways...he came into work today by himself wearing a tie (aww) and got a breakfast (basted eggs, brown toast, extra egg i/o bacon). janel was talking to him after i took his order, and when she was free i told her that i though he was cute. and she was like yeah, well, he taught me in grade 12. (clarification. janel graduated same time i did, and constantine (or shawn, as his name really is, looks pretty young. i would have said 19 at the most.) turns out he was an intern at murray (?) and is now an actual teacher of sorts. but he's only like 23 or 24, which is fine. BECAUSE I'M GOING TO MARRY HIM. but, yeah, some of you go to murray, maybe you know him and want to help us get married. married and married. wow. that was far too long of a paragraph about him. ick. i have to go and shoot myself. i'm sorry, but i really like cute boys. i like cute boys who wear flashing lights t-shirts and are vegetarian and are teachers (this means he likes kids...). i also like stalking.
i still am insisting on not dating until i can't not....but i could wait awhile for him. i sound crazy.

i'm reading this trilogy of 'teen' books from england called 'ready?' 'sex' and 'go'. they're really good. i'm on 'sex' now. and it is so well written about. just reinforcing my never dating strategy though.

also reinforcing that today was thinking about how me and hillary and megan used to talk about how long you wait influences how good of a turn you get. we're right you know. and i'd trade a good long turn for so many of these trists i've been having (fine, the word trist isn't quite right, but it was fun to use it).
o, but here's a doozy; i caught myself vauguely missing aaron today. well, actually only missing the way he smiled sometimes. it was really cute. blah blah blah. loading my gun.

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(when constantine/shawn was ordering he leaned on the counter towards me smiling and cocking his head...and looking so inquisitive. i'm such a fucking girl.)

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IT'S THE LONGEST ENTRY EVER!

previously - and then

*oh random entry*

all the diarylands. - 2008.02.21
I move my head. - 2008.01.27
read the other one. - 2008.01.21
was Medium? - 2008-01-17
Or maybe I won't. - 2008.01.15

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