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disclaimer: this is the life and times of meredith r. mistletoe. i'm making a slight attempt to disguise my identity and hide things that i write about and pretend i don't feel things i do. but if you read this and i don't know you read it, then you read it at your own risk. and you should let me know you're reading it... especially because a lot of the time things need clarifying or aren't quite true anymore or etc etc etc.

note: potential employers: please do not judge me on my diaryland. that's lame.

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2002.08.31 4:49 p.m.

holy fucking weird night.
no not that extreme.....i guess. operation plan get meredith in a good mood went quite nicely, although today i am less than impressive. mood wise....hot wise, however. yes, nicely drunken, not anywhere near to sick or bad, just dancing happily by myself in corners and not being able to watch 'wait until dark' (frightening) and irratating people...and other things. it was nice to be with people again and like them. i really like toby, he's sooo friendly. i can't believe ali thinks she's leaving us. fucking hell. it was odd though. odd night. with odd results. tom got home just fine apparantly even though we weren't sure where he'd wandered off to in the dark and the rain. and alyssa wasn't alright and we tried so hard to make sure that she was. and i don't know. it's so hard to figure out what to say and what needs to be heard. i'm so sorry alyssa. i'm sorry. i didn't know how to be good to you. i want you to be okay.
fraser says he's not going to mitch's anymore because when he does one of his friends ends up in the hospital.
me and andrew were trying to talk about alyssa but we couldn't understand.....hard. less hard for us then it is for her though.

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ryan was odd and went home and mehta was sad and went home. ali was stoned out of her tree and amused me. alisin was a Terribly Supportive Friend. and silly. and let me have some beer. mattdean was good to see because i don't know him anymore. i wished alix and kim had come. and graeme.

.

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all of my relationships with everyone feel so screwed up. and in some ways i just do more and more to wreck them. oi. i don't care. i don't care. i don't care. i'm trying not to care. go ahead and leave me, all of you.

. it's all going off

previously - and then

*oh random entry*

all the diarylands. - 2008.02.21
I move my head. - 2008.01.27
read the other one. - 2008.01.21
was Medium? - 2008-01-17
Or maybe I won't. - 2008.01.15

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